All Things New

2 Corinthians 5:21 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!"
Revelation 21:5  He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”

     I don't think I can tell you what I was like before I met Jesus.  I was in the third grade, nearly thirteen years ago.  On all counts I was probably an average little kid.  As far as I'm concerned, I was a good kid, but maybe I oughta ask my mom and dad.  I'm not discouraged by this, because I still walk with Jesus.  There's no denying in that moment I became a new creation, but I can't give you any detail of who I was before.  However, I can tell you who I was several years ago before I actually started walking with Jesus.  I was a hot head; my temper was my master.  Lust was my friend; I would jump at every chance to look at any form of pornography.  I was only concerned with "me"; how can I benefit?  What good will come of this for me?  Very rarely was I really concerned with "we."  Encountering and rededicating my life to Jesus flipped all of that around.  "We" suddenly became more important than "I."  Jesus is my Master--and Friend--not my temper.  I struggle with lust, sure, but it doesn't rule me; I can say no.
     Looking down the line, yes I'm certainly a different person.  I'm not who I was even a year ago.  I remember when I came back from Medford a year and a half ago, I decided that I was no longer "Knappy" but Jordan.  This wasn't just some individuality thing that I was wanting to just be Jordan.  No, "Knappy" had his own time, he had his place and he is no more.  Jesus didn't make Knappy, I did.  Why would I want to be someone that I'm not?  I'm the best at being me and nobody else can be me.  Don't get me wrong, I don't jump on anybody who calls me that; for some it sounds like I'm in trouble if they use "Jordan."  For those select few, they know who I am and who I used to be and they don't confuse the two.  And certainly, there have been events that have happened in my life that have helped to shape who I am, but ultimately I am clay in the hand of the Almighty.  I desire to be mold-able, conformed to the image that He desires me to be.  I won't bow to what any person will say about me, because my identity isn't within the mind of man.  It's within the mind of my Savior. 
     Recently, life hasn't been the smoothest.  I've had some incredible highs and some unfortunate lows as well.  I think I've been waiting for something "big" to happen in my life that will make everything change.  But, I've been finding that that's not the case; no life is about doing all the small things well.  The small things that you do well will progress into the big things of life.  Truthfully, life is in the little things; the majority of it is taken up by the small things.  One small step at a time, one day at a time.  God can certainly do big things, and He does do big things, but He's also the God of the small things too.  For instance, if you want to pray, nothing's going to happen unless you start to pray.  You begin a lifestyle of prayer by praying.  It's also like if you want to lift a lot of heavy weight.  If you've never worked out in your life, you won't be able to lift heavy things.  It takes a process of continually going to the gym and working out your muscles, working on the small weight and then progressively getting to the larger weights.  Life become big once you've mastered the small things.
     I have found that there is one constant to my life, and it will never change: Jesus.  I don't need to ask Him to come near me because He's always near me.  Sure, there are times where I feel like I step away, but does that mean He walks away, too?  He's not petty; His love is greater than that.  His hand is always on my shoulder, and there is nothing more reassuring than having somebody's hand placed on your shoulder.  It tells you that they're with you, that they got your back.  God's hand is always on my shoulder.  Is life always easy?  No, but Jesus is always with me and that makes life worth it.