God promised Abraham a son, and that his descendants would be as numerous as the stars in the sky. After time, Isaac was born, of whom Abraham's seed was going to come from and all people shall be blessed through. Then God said, "Sacrifice your son." That had to be crazy for Abraham to hear at first. Yet, he still did it, and didn't even bring a ram as a substitute for his son Isaac. He believed God would provide. The reasoning behind God doing that, though? I believe it was this: Abraham held the promise and the fulfilment of his son over his God. He treasured Isaac over his Lord. God isn't okay with that, for He is a jealous God and the first commandment (to be given to Abraham's descendants on a later date) spells out that no God can come before Him, lest they want to be struck down. God wants all of us, therefore we give Him ALL of us, including our dreams.
I've been wrestling with this one. I've placed so much weight on God's promise and I've game planned upon that being true and nothing else going to happen for me. I've had countless confirmations from people and I heard from God Himself, how can it not be true? I've heard this from a very wise pastor once, that once you're a pastor, or have the call of pastoring, you're a pastor wherever you go, not just a position you have at a church. In light of that, God was basically saying, "Are you okay with this not looking like how you thought? Are you okay with this not being exactly how you see it?"
I've been wrestling with this. A lot. It's not that I don't trust God's plan for my life or that I feel like I need to do it all on my own, however that I just need to give all of me unto Him. ALL OF ME. That includes my dreams, passions, desires and "plans" I have for my life. Realistically all my dreams and passions are God-given. I'm to be a steward of them and use them to bring glory to the One who gave them to me. Also, I must not hold them with closed hands but to hold them with open hands because they are His, not mine. He has a very specific purpose for each and every one of those dreams and desires of mine to accomplish a very specific purpose while I'm here preparing for eternity.
I know where God has called me, and I don't believe He changes His mind about His children or His plan for them. But I do believe being a pastor is much more than just being at church preparing messages and preaching on Sunday. I believe that God has called me and has placed a dream upon my life to be a pastor, a shepherd of His flock. But those are His dreams that He gave to me and I'm to be a faithful steward and do all that I can with them until He reckons me home.
To God be the glory!
